“I don’t care too much for money, cos money can’t buy me love.” The Beatles sang those words earnestly, and whilst they may also be very true, another truth is that it can pay for an awful lot of things. Money is also, according to the old saying ‘the root of all evil’, and whilst that may also have some truth in it, the fact is that it can make life so much easier. But, when it comes to relationships, money can and does have an impact.
Shepherds Friendly have conducted a survey and partnered up with psychologist and relationship expert, Dr Becky Spelman to find out more about the power money can hold on relationships, and how many impacts relationships. The survey asks a range of questions to find out attitudes towards money in a relationship, and then examines the questions to see the difference in the answers that men and women give. The results are, in some cases, both surprising and illuminating.
For instance, far more women than men think that money plays a part in how attractive you find a partner. This could be linked to a traditional idea of men as the breadwinner and women as the homemaker, or even have its roots in the old ‘gold digger’ scenario. It is interesting that the older women believed this to be true much more than younger women, so maybe, as women become more financially independent, that will cease to be a factor.
Another quite shocking result in 2018 is that almost 70% of men still believe that they should foot the bill on date night, with only 41% of women in agreement. Women, especially women in the 18-29 age group, tend to believe that, in our modern times, the bill should be split 50-50, but men are definitely still in favour of a more chivalric stance that is really surprising and seems quite traditional in 2018.
One thing that both sexes do tend to agree on is that saving for the future is very important. Maybe this has grown in significance and importance with the uncertainty about pensions and the issues with the employment market, and having a partner who seems to feel the same way is not only important, but is comforting too.
Money should not be the heart of a relationship, but it is an important factor and something that a couple need to agree on and be honest about in order for the relationship to progress and be healthy.